The young, young soldier is reading from the Bible. Someone standing behind Grace whispers, did you know he saw them two he joined up wiv die out in Iraq?
The two minute silence. The minister breaks in with and Lord, God, Father in heaven we thank you for the election of your great and appointed man, Barack Obama, who will save us all from war. There's crying in the congregation.
(This is Britain. Sometimes we cry about dead teenage soldiers and the dreadful things happening in the Middle East. But crying about the promises made by a politician, that's all very new.)
Showing posts with label dialogues and encounters and suchlike. Show all posts
Showing posts with label dialogues and encounters and suchlike. Show all posts
Tuesday, 11 November 2008
Friday, 5 September 2008
Call upon the Lord or The Cat who thinks he's God
The scene is set at home. BELOVED is out for the evening and a crowd of 70-odd teenagers have descended for a night of merrymaking and revelry. GRACE has retreated to the bedroom with her proverbial cup of cocoa and the laptop. The cat, AMOS, is wandering bemused and disorientated outside. GRACE creeps downstairs to call AMOS in.
GRACE: Amos! Aaaaaaaaaa-mos!
TEENAGER 1: What?
TEENAGER 2: It's her cat. He's called Amos. You know, as in from the Bible...
TEENAGER 3: Let's help her out!
TEENAGERS 1-70: Amos! Aaaaaaaaaa-mos! Come here! Good boy!
AMOS does not respond.
TEENAGER 3: I know. Let's all call Jesus and see what happens!
TEENAGERS 1-70: Jesus! Jeeeeeeeesus! JEEEEEEE-SUSSSSSSSSSSS!
AMOS comes running through the door and bounds in amongst the partygoers. TEENAGERS 1-70 applaud. TEENAGER 3 offers AMOS a swig from his pint glass of red wine, which AMOS takes by his front paws and drinks...
GRACE: Amos! Aaaaaaaaaa-mos!
TEENAGER 1: What?
TEENAGER 2: It's her cat. He's called Amos. You know, as in from the Bible...
TEENAGER 3: Let's help her out!
TEENAGERS 1-70: Amos! Aaaaaaaaaa-mos! Come here! Good boy!
AMOS does not respond.
TEENAGER 3: I know. Let's all call Jesus and see what happens!
TEENAGERS 1-70: Jesus! Jeeeeeeeesus! JEEEEEEE-SUSSSSSSSSSSS!
AMOS comes running through the door and bounds in amongst the partygoers. TEENAGERS 1-70 applaud. TEENAGER 3 offers AMOS a swig from his pint glass of red wine, which AMOS takes by his front paws and drinks...
Sunday, 31 August 2008
Grace and Beloved's Church Search Week 11: An exceptionally friendly church
SCENE 1: A SERVICE AT EXCEPTIONALLY FRIENDLY CHURCH (EFC)
EFC is celebrating the Eucharist. GRACE stands up to join the line as BELOVED stays seated, as is his preference. Three women approach Grace as she queues.
WOMAN ONE: Does your husband need communion taking to his seat?
GRACE: He doesn't take communion. But thank you, anyway.
WOMAN TWO: Would he mind us introducing ourselves to him after the service?
GRACE: Not at all. He'd love that, I'm sure. Thanks.
SCENE 2: ALMOST AN HOUR AFTER THE END OF THE SERVICE
All three women plus the husband of one of them and the vicar and curate are still sitting talking intently, animatedly and interestedly to BELOVED. GRACE has protested several times that she and BELOVED do not want to detain them, but all insist that they have nothing more delightful to do than consider the questions of such a man as BELOVED.
Jesus, I think, would have been so proud.
EFC is celebrating the Eucharist. GRACE stands up to join the line as BELOVED stays seated, as is his preference. Three women approach Grace as she queues.
WOMAN ONE: Does your husband need communion taking to his seat?
GRACE: He doesn't take communion. But thank you, anyway.
WOMAN TWO: Would he mind us introducing ourselves to him after the service?
GRACE: Not at all. He'd love that, I'm sure. Thanks.
SCENE 2: ALMOST AN HOUR AFTER THE END OF THE SERVICE
All three women plus the husband of one of them and the vicar and curate are still sitting talking intently, animatedly and interestedly to BELOVED. GRACE has protested several times that she and BELOVED do not want to detain them, but all insist that they have nothing more delightful to do than consider the questions of such a man as BELOVED.
Jesus, I think, would have been so proud.
Wednesday, 6 August 2008
an anecdote of great pathos and irony as Grace learns of how her alleged evangelical credentials almost precluded her from getting a job
GRACE is at an appointment with the head of HR at her Place of Future Employment, discussing terms and conditions and various contractual and day-to-day practicalities of her New Job.
HEAD OF HR: ... and we were wondering, Grace, whether it'd be helpful for you to know why we chose you for this position?
GRACE: Um, yes, that'd be encouraging.
HEAD OF HR: Well, it was all in your interpretation of Question 4... you took it to a depth that none of the other candidates had grasped... and with such originality, creativity and confidence. You obviously have quite a mind.
(GRACE opens her mouth to tell HEAD OF HR that she was actually merely applying a method of analysis developed by a certain form of theology, and decides instead graciously to accept the unwarranted compliment.)
GRACE: Thank you. That's kind.
HEAD OF HR: ... though I probably also should be honest and tell you that, of all the candidates shortlisted for interview, you were the one I thought probably least likely to have been chosen.
GRACE: Er, go on.
HEAD OF HR: I mean, your application was outstanding. Not the very best, but impressive, nevertheless, and by the criteria we'd devised, we'd never not have shortlisted you. It's just that, when the form asked for your personal and academic interests, you'd written, I thnk, "theology", "faith communities" and even the Bible... and I can only be honest in telling you that it really made a few of our team quite wary of you. Especially as you've just come from working at a very, ahem, no-I-shouldn't-say-that church.
GRACE: Oh...
HEAD OF HR: Yes, we sort of worried, or were perhaps concerned that you'd maybe use the job - or use the interview even - as an attempt to, maybe, share or impose your religion on us. Which honestly, wouldn't have been appropriate.
(GRACE is very tempted to launch into a bitter tirade about how and why all such Bible bashers hate her. She composes herself, and smiles gently.)
GRACE: That's not really my style.
HEAD OF HR: And in a country as free as ours, you wouldn't need to, would you? Nobody needs to take a job as a pretext for proseltysing. I mean, anyone can stand on street corners or knock on doors and preach.
(GRACE resolves not to tell HEAD OF HR that, many years back, the street corners and doorsteps was exactly what she used to do.)
I mean, my goodness. One minute I'm the devil's spawn to Christians, the next minute I'm some earnest Bible-thumping praise-the-Lord-er to the rest of the world. And to think that I feared discrimination on the grounds of being a bit mental, too. To have been employed on account one's evangelical credentials is obviously far, far worse. Oh dear. Thank God I've actually got a job. Otherwise my future prospects would by now be entirely dead.
HEAD OF HR: ... and we were wondering, Grace, whether it'd be helpful for you to know why we chose you for this position?
GRACE: Um, yes, that'd be encouraging.
HEAD OF HR: Well, it was all in your interpretation of Question 4... you took it to a depth that none of the other candidates had grasped... and with such originality, creativity and confidence. You obviously have quite a mind.
(GRACE opens her mouth to tell HEAD OF HR that she was actually merely applying a method of analysis developed by a certain form of theology, and decides instead graciously to accept the unwarranted compliment.)
GRACE: Thank you. That's kind.
HEAD OF HR: ... though I probably also should be honest and tell you that, of all the candidates shortlisted for interview, you were the one I thought probably least likely to have been chosen.
GRACE: Er, go on.
HEAD OF HR: I mean, your application was outstanding. Not the very best, but impressive, nevertheless, and by the criteria we'd devised, we'd never not have shortlisted you. It's just that, when the form asked for your personal and academic interests, you'd written, I thnk, "theology", "faith communities" and even the Bible... and I can only be honest in telling you that it really made a few of our team quite wary of you. Especially as you've just come from working at a very, ahem, no-I-shouldn't-say-that church.
GRACE: Oh...
HEAD OF HR: Yes, we sort of worried, or were perhaps concerned that you'd maybe use the job - or use the interview even - as an attempt to, maybe, share or impose your religion on us. Which honestly, wouldn't have been appropriate.
(GRACE is very tempted to launch into a bitter tirade about how and why all such Bible bashers hate her. She composes herself, and smiles gently.)
GRACE: That's not really my style.
HEAD OF HR: And in a country as free as ours, you wouldn't need to, would you? Nobody needs to take a job as a pretext for proseltysing. I mean, anyone can stand on street corners or knock on doors and preach.
(GRACE resolves not to tell HEAD OF HR that, many years back, the street corners and doorsteps was exactly what she used to do.)
I mean, my goodness. One minute I'm the devil's spawn to Christians, the next minute I'm some earnest Bible-thumping praise-the-Lord-er to the rest of the world. And to think that I feared discrimination on the grounds of being a bit mental, too. To have been employed on account one's evangelical credentials is obviously far, far worse. Oh dear. Thank God I've actually got a job. Otherwise my future prospects would by now be entirely dead.
Wednesday, 30 July 2008
a person who sins
(This is a post I've slightly recycled from a while back. But given that it sort of touches on what I've been thinking about, I thought it'd be interesting to re-post)
Scene 1: Two friends in the pub, circa 2003
KATH: Did you hear that Kelly's a schizophrenic now?
GRACE: (in self-righteous tones) Yes, but you can't call her that.
KATH: What?
GRACE: A schizophrenic. She's a child of God. Maybe she has schizophrenia or has been told she has schizophrenia or been diagnosed with schizophrenia... but she's still a child of God, first and foremost. The schizophrenia shouldn't define her. Person-first language, and all that...
KATH: But Kelly's calling herself a schizophrenic. Reclamation of language, empowerment, de-stigmatising, you know. And if she's calling herself that, you shouldn't patronise her by refusing to use her choice of terminology.
GRACE: Yes, but I object to the terminology. I'm, like, challenging her, affirming her dignity.
Scene 2: Two friends in the pub, circa 2008
GRACE: Have you seen Kelly recently?
KATH: Yes, she's fine, I think she's working at a bank in Slough. But I was thinking... do you remember that discussion we had, when you refused to allow me to call her a schizophrenic.
GRACE: Yes...
KATH: And you're still into all your church-type stuff?
GRACE: Yes...
KATH: So are you still a sinner? Or rather, am I? Aren't we both?
GRACE: Um, yes. All of us are sinners.
KATH: You're a sinner?
GRACE: Well, saved by faith and grace and all that..
KATH: But don't you see my point?
GRACE: No...
KATH: Well, you go off it with how dismissive and disempowering it is for anyone to call Kelly "a schizophrenic"... and yet, why do you still do the standard Christian thing of referring to yourself as "a sinner"? Aren't you simply a person who sins?"
Very, very good point. Quite a massive theological thought-shift.
Scene 1: Two friends in the pub, circa 2003
KATH: Did you hear that Kelly's a schizophrenic now?
GRACE: (in self-righteous tones) Yes, but you can't call her that.
KATH: What?
GRACE: A schizophrenic. She's a child of God. Maybe she has schizophrenia or has been told she has schizophrenia or been diagnosed with schizophrenia... but she's still a child of God, first and foremost. The schizophrenia shouldn't define her. Person-first language, and all that...
KATH: But Kelly's calling herself a schizophrenic. Reclamation of language, empowerment, de-stigmatising, you know. And if she's calling herself that, you shouldn't patronise her by refusing to use her choice of terminology.
GRACE: Yes, but I object to the terminology. I'm, like, challenging her, affirming her dignity.
Scene 2: Two friends in the pub, circa 2008
GRACE: Have you seen Kelly recently?
KATH: Yes, she's fine, I think she's working at a bank in Slough. But I was thinking... do you remember that discussion we had, when you refused to allow me to call her a schizophrenic.
GRACE: Yes...
KATH: And you're still into all your church-type stuff?
GRACE: Yes...
KATH: So are you still a sinner? Or rather, am I? Aren't we both?
GRACE: Um, yes. All of us are sinners.
KATH: You're a sinner?
GRACE: Well, saved by faith and grace and all that..
KATH: But don't you see my point?
GRACE: No...
KATH: Well, you go off it with how dismissive and disempowering it is for anyone to call Kelly "a schizophrenic"... and yet, why do you still do the standard Christian thing of referring to yourself as "a sinner"? Aren't you simply a person who sins?"
Very, very good point. Quite a massive theological thought-shift.
Tuesday, 22 July 2008
Another puzzling public anecdote to fill blog space whilst Grace thinks of something intelligent to write
The scene is set beside the junction of two major roads. A park bench has been placed there by the council, seemingly for no other purpose than to give members of the public full view of the intersection. A YOUNG WOMAN is seated on the bench, breastfeeding. GRACE enters from stage right, dripping in sweat and clutching a bike helmet and a bottle of Pepsi Max.
GRACE: Would you mind me sitting here?
YOUNG WOMAN: As long as you don't mind me feeding...
GRACE: Of course not.
YOUNG WOMAN: It's just that, I'm never sure whether it's OK in public, you know, to feed him.
Well, if she was that worried about breastfeeding "in public", why was she sitting in full view of hundreds of motorists?
GRACE: Would you mind me sitting here?
YOUNG WOMAN: As long as you don't mind me feeding...
GRACE: Of course not.
YOUNG WOMAN: It's just that, I'm never sure whether it's OK in public, you know, to feed him.
Well, if she was that worried about breastfeeding "in public", why was she sitting in full view of hundreds of motorists?
Monday, 21 July 2008
Grace and Beloved's ChurchSearch Week 5: Grace and Beloved have Family Commitments instead
Family Commitments of a scale and magnitude that nobody would deny to be more important than churchsearching... but, as such, totally unblogaboutable. I'm sure there's a good few posts in there about doing Family Commitments as an expression of faith, about how/why the church constructs Family and/or constructs itself as a family... but I probably won't get there today.
The train home yesterday evening was cramped, stuffy and very slow. We shared a carriage with a family of nine children, all aged below five (cousins? foster children?) and all piled on top of one another and all yelling and throwing jelly babies at one another in a mixture of French and a language I couldn't identify. About an hour into the journey, their dad (or uncle? big brother? carer?) took out his iPod and some speakers and plugged them in, broadcasting "We want to see Jesus lifted high" at full volume to the entire train. And slowly, five of the nine children climbed into the aisles and began to dance. I wasn't sure whether they were dancing because they wanted to or had been trained to, but they were giggling and seemed to be enjoying themselves. The rest of the carriage watched, amazed...
The train home yesterday evening was cramped, stuffy and very slow. We shared a carriage with a family of nine children, all aged below five (cousins? foster children?) and all piled on top of one another and all yelling and throwing jelly babies at one another in a mixture of French and a language I couldn't identify. About an hour into the journey, their dad (or uncle? big brother? carer?) took out his iPod and some speakers and plugged them in, broadcasting "We want to see Jesus lifted high" at full volume to the entire train. And slowly, five of the nine children climbed into the aisles and began to dance. I wasn't sure whether they were dancing because they wanted to or had been trained to, but they were giggling and seemed to be enjoying themselves. The rest of the carriage watched, amazed...
Friday, 18 July 2008
Does this encapsulate Britain's view of the Church of England today?
Grace hands her birth and marriage certificates to an administrator at her New Job, in order to verify her identity and eligibility to work in the UK.
ADMINISTRATOR: Grace, thank you. Right, then... so you were born Grace This and married to become Grace That. And now your place of birth... Lambeth... hang on, Lambeth?
GRACE: It's a London borough, just south of the Thames.
ADMINISTRATOR: No, but I've been hearing the name Lambeth on the radio all week... I don't know why...
Does this encapsulate your average non-Londoner's view of the Church of England today? It made me smile, anyway...
ADMINISTRATOR: Grace, thank you. Right, then... so you were born Grace This and married to become Grace That. And now your place of birth... Lambeth... hang on, Lambeth?
GRACE: It's a London borough, just south of the Thames.
ADMINISTRATOR: No, but I've been hearing the name Lambeth on the radio all week... I don't know why...
Does this encapsulate your average non-Londoner's view of the Church of England today? It made me smile, anyway...
Friday, 11 July 2008
an anecdote wot proves there is nice employment practice out there really
I've just got back from an early morning trip to the local 24 hour supermarket. I'd needed nail polish remover, tea bags and apples. As one does, and all.
This is what I overheard...
SHIFT SUPERVISOR: How you doing there mate? Aren't you about due your break?
SHELF STACKER: (in limited English) No I fine. But I only need call, call Nature.
SHIFT SUPERVISOR: (extracting mobile from pocket) No problem there mate. Call whoever you want. Use my mobile.
SHELF STACKER: No, I need, I need (stage whisper in Supervisor's ear)
SHIFT SUPERVISOR: Yes mate, you don't need to ask my permission. But for future reference, it's the call of nature...
Lovely, I think.
This is what I overheard...
SHIFT SUPERVISOR: How you doing there mate? Aren't you about due your break?
SHELF STACKER: (in limited English) No I fine. But I only need call, call Nature.
SHIFT SUPERVISOR: (extracting mobile from pocket) No problem there mate. Call whoever you want. Use my mobile.
SHELF STACKER: No, I need, I need (stage whisper in Supervisor's ear)
SHIFT SUPERVISOR: Yes mate, you don't need to ask my permission. But for future reference, it's the call of nature...
Lovely, I think.
Monday, 19 May 2008
On being outed as losing faith in evangelicals. A conversation I entangled myself in today...
The scene is set at Grace's workplace
ADMINISTRATOR ... so now that we've arranged for you to go to Big Evangelistic Crusade on Thursday at 6, I'll have a ring round the volunteers to see who can cover for your 4.30 meeting with Statutory Agency.
GRACE (looking embarrassed and apologetic) I'm sorry, I should have realised the clash. It was before the honeymoon, though, that I'd arranged with Statutory Agency...
ADMINISTRATOR Really, Grace, don't worry about it. It'll be good experience for a volunteer.
GRACE Yes, but it's still supposed to be my responsibility. It's what I'm paid for here.
ADMINISTRATOR But you'll be wanting to go to Big Evangelistic Crusade, surely.
GRACE There'll be other chances. And all of our volunteers will be wanting to be there, too. I don't want to deprive any of them of the opportunity.
Enter TRUSTEE from stage left
TRUSTEE (interrupting) ... but we don't want to deprive you of the opportunity, Grace.
GRACE Thank you, that's kind.
ADMINISTRATOR So which would you rather do? Go to Big Evangelistic Crusade or a meeting with Statutory Agency?
GRACE I couldn't possibly answer.
TRUSTEE Why not?
GRACE It's not about which I prefer. It's about how I can best be used to serve God.
TRUSTEE That's deep of you.
ADMINISTRATOR But which would you prefer?
GRACE (taking a very deep breath) The meeting with Statutory Agency.
Pause
ADMINISTRATOR Right, so if I can't find anyone from amongst the volunteers to cover for the Statutory Agency meeting by the time the coach leaves for Big Evangelistic Crusade, I'll let you know...
ADMINISTRATOR ... so now that we've arranged for you to go to Big Evangelistic Crusade on Thursday at 6, I'll have a ring round the volunteers to see who can cover for your 4.30 meeting with Statutory Agency.
GRACE (looking embarrassed and apologetic) I'm sorry, I should have realised the clash. It was before the honeymoon, though, that I'd arranged with Statutory Agency...
ADMINISTRATOR Really, Grace, don't worry about it. It'll be good experience for a volunteer.
GRACE Yes, but it's still supposed to be my responsibility. It's what I'm paid for here.
ADMINISTRATOR But you'll be wanting to go to Big Evangelistic Crusade, surely.
GRACE There'll be other chances. And all of our volunteers will be wanting to be there, too. I don't want to deprive any of them of the opportunity.
Enter TRUSTEE from stage left
TRUSTEE (interrupting) ... but we don't want to deprive you of the opportunity, Grace.
GRACE Thank you, that's kind.
ADMINISTRATOR So which would you rather do? Go to Big Evangelistic Crusade or a meeting with Statutory Agency?
GRACE I couldn't possibly answer.
TRUSTEE Why not?
GRACE It's not about which I prefer. It's about how I can best be used to serve God.
TRUSTEE That's deep of you.
ADMINISTRATOR But which would you prefer?
GRACE (taking a very deep breath) The meeting with Statutory Agency.
Pause
ADMINISTRATOR Right, so if I can't find anyone from amongst the volunteers to cover for the Statutory Agency meeting by the time the coach leaves for Big Evangelistic Crusade, I'll let you know...
Monday, 14 April 2008
a triumph of experience over hope? a conversation with a child far, far too young for the conversation we were having.
A conversation, too, that made me very sad for the girl with whom I had it...
HER: My Mummy says you're having a wedding.
ME: Yes. Do you want to come and bring her to the wedding?
HER: I don't like weddings.
ME: Why not?
HER: (Pauses, pouting) Well you'll have to have babies really quickly...
ME: (Cringing slightly) Er, we'll see what happens.
HER: ... 'cos you got to have babies before you split up. Once you're split up you can't have babies any more 'cos you're calling each other bad words and shouting.
ME: We're not planning to split up.
HER: Really? You're never going to split up?
ME: I don't know. But we're going to try really, really hard not to split up.
HER: (Eyes widening) So you might never ever ever split up?
ME: I hope we'll never ever ever ever ever split up.
HER: But (starts chewing a strand of hair) I didn't know you could hope about that.
HER: My Mummy says you're having a wedding.
ME: Yes. Do you want to come and bring her to the wedding?
HER: I don't like weddings.
ME: Why not?
HER: (Pauses, pouting) Well you'll have to have babies really quickly...
ME: (Cringing slightly) Er, we'll see what happens.
HER: ... 'cos you got to have babies before you split up. Once you're split up you can't have babies any more 'cos you're calling each other bad words and shouting.
ME: We're not planning to split up.
HER: Really? You're never going to split up?
ME: I don't know. But we're going to try really, really hard not to split up.
HER: (Eyes widening) So you might never ever ever split up?
ME: I hope we'll never ever ever ever ever split up.
HER: But (starts chewing a strand of hair) I didn't know you could hope about that.
Monday, 5 November 2007
fellow travellers #3
The fireworks began as soon as it got dark... well, that was about ten days ago now. But the banging began long before I left work this evening. I stood at the top of my road, the highest point for miles around, and watched.
It's a bit grim when you think about it, really. And the more I do think about it, the more I grow in sympathy for Guy Fawkes. Attempting to blow up the Houses of Parliament was an indisputably stupid thing to do, of course. But perhaps Guy Fawkes felt that he has no other option, no other means by which to express his sense of oppression. Perhaps he was motivated not by powerlust or anger as much as his longing for religious freedom and his desperation simply to be allowed to worship God as he needed to.
The local authority in which I live has a policy of providing as many free Guy Fawkes night bonfires and fireworks displays as it can. Their thinking being that their provision will prevent local NEETs, unwashed and "communities" from randomly aiming lighted rockets into one another's yards. In an area so historically divided, racist and inflammatory, one can see their thinking. But yet it's ironic, in response to Guy Fawkes' attempt to fight state control of something, the government seeks to impose a controlled response. Like in all these new anti-terror measures.
I've never been particularly anarchist or libertarian, but I can't help wondering. If we all allowed those around us to believe whatever they want and worship however they like, what would happen?
And what would be the theological implications - and prerequisites - for that amongst people who believe that there is only one Saviour?
I don't know the answers to my own questions. But all around me, the firworks continue.
It's a bit grim when you think about it, really. And the more I do think about it, the more I grow in sympathy for Guy Fawkes. Attempting to blow up the Houses of Parliament was an indisputably stupid thing to do, of course. But perhaps Guy Fawkes felt that he has no other option, no other means by which to express his sense of oppression. Perhaps he was motivated not by powerlust or anger as much as his longing for religious freedom and his desperation simply to be allowed to worship God as he needed to.
The local authority in which I live has a policy of providing as many free Guy Fawkes night bonfires and fireworks displays as it can. Their thinking being that their provision will prevent local NEETs, unwashed and "communities" from randomly aiming lighted rockets into one another's yards. In an area so historically divided, racist and inflammatory, one can see their thinking. But yet it's ironic, in response to Guy Fawkes' attempt to fight state control of something, the government seeks to impose a controlled response. Like in all these new anti-terror measures.
I've never been particularly anarchist or libertarian, but I can't help wondering. If we all allowed those around us to believe whatever they want and worship however they like, what would happen?
And what would be the theological implications - and prerequisites - for that amongst people who believe that there is only one Saviour?
I don't know the answers to my own questions. But all around me, the firworks continue.
Thursday, 1 November 2007
fellow travellers #2
I think I inadvertantly Outed a volunteer I work with last week. She was asking why things seem a little ahem awkward between myself and a certain member of the management. I was telling her that we had exchanged ahem words about me having a Fiance who is Unsaved and Divorced. Before she had a chance to even consider offering any further ahem words, I added, jovially, "well at least he's a he. If we were talking even about a saved un-divorced woman I were in love with, we'd both be crucified in boiling oil".
It was only after she'd left the room in tears that I realised what I'd done.
She's a wonderful woman, so positive, so creative and God loves her so much. The only question I want to ask her is how, how do you cope with living and working and being in a situation in which you have to hide who you are?
I don't think that there is any non gay-specific (ie Metroplitan Community Church etc) area of Christianity in which being openly gay (or bi, lesbian, transgender etc) is an easy thing. But the most conservative, evanglical, traditional, male-dominated (well, that'd be them all) dare-I-say-fundamentalist churches are definately the least tolerant, caring or thoughtful. The Church of England's current tearing of itself apart over questions of sexuality are a mere microcosm of the wider Church. And the way in which the Church is currently responding to questions of sexuality is exactly the same way in which it was responding to gender issues a generation ago, and to considering questions of ethnicity a while before that.
So whereas, of course, I'm in an immesurably easier position than the colleague I accidentally de-closeted, I still believe that their opposition to our marriage remains not an issue of faith or theology but of diversity, different-ness, other-ness. The more our detractors tell me "now it's not because he's [ethnic and religious background of Fiance] it's because he's Unsaved and Divorced" the more I feel they keep saying that only to persuade themselves. And that all raises, I think, massive questions about the nature of faith affiliation, selfhood, identity and what it measn essentially to be human in relation to God.
"Give it another two hundred years" Fiance says, "and then they'll stop hassling and accept that we love one another."
And what, then, in the meantime? Does one run from any church that seeks to reject the most fundemental parts of one's being? Or does one stay and hope that, through one's persistence, that two hundred years might become only one hundred and fifty?
It was only after she'd left the room in tears that I realised what I'd done.
She's a wonderful woman, so positive, so creative and God loves her so much. The only question I want to ask her is how, how do you cope with living and working and being in a situation in which you have to hide who you are?
I don't think that there is any non gay-specific (ie Metroplitan Community Church etc) area of Christianity in which being openly gay (or bi, lesbian, transgender etc) is an easy thing. But the most conservative, evanglical, traditional, male-dominated (well, that'd be them all) dare-I-say-fundamentalist churches are definately the least tolerant, caring or thoughtful. The Church of England's current tearing of itself apart over questions of sexuality are a mere microcosm of the wider Church. And the way in which the Church is currently responding to questions of sexuality is exactly the same way in which it was responding to gender issues a generation ago, and to considering questions of ethnicity a while before that.
So whereas, of course, I'm in an immesurably easier position than the colleague I accidentally de-closeted, I still believe that their opposition to our marriage remains not an issue of faith or theology but of diversity, different-ness, other-ness. The more our detractors tell me "now it's not because he's [ethnic and religious background of Fiance] it's because he's Unsaved and Divorced" the more I feel they keep saying that only to persuade themselves. And that all raises, I think, massive questions about the nature of faith affiliation, selfhood, identity and what it measn essentially to be human in relation to God.
"Give it another two hundred years" Fiance says, "and then they'll stop hassling and accept that we love one another."
And what, then, in the meantime? Does one run from any church that seeks to reject the most fundemental parts of one's being? Or does one stay and hope that, through one's persistence, that two hundred years might become only one hundred and fifty?
Sunday, 21 October 2007
fellow travellers
This conversation really did take place at a party I was at last night.
NEW ACQUAINTANCE AT PARTY Good evening, so you're Grace? How do you do? Pleased to meet you!
GRACE (slightly taken aback by NAAP's formality) Hi, yes. And how do you know [name of party host omitted for confidentiality] ?
NAAP We're at church together. And I'm a surgeon like her.
GRACE (noting that NAAP appears of an ethnicity not usually indigenous to the region) So have you come over here for a job with [party host]?
NAAP No, it's a long story. But what do you do for a living?
GRACE [description of job omitted for confidentiality]
NAAP Ah Praise the Lord! Now I will indeed tell you. I have come here for a year out, seeking a Road to Damascus experience!
GRACE (thinking "why would anyone want to come here from halfway across the world to do that?!") Now this isn't a place many choose for that...
NAAP At home, in London even, my family is such that, within my community, I've got so much wealth, status... I'm treated as royalty, I am royalty. I chose here because nobody would know my background, I'd not be treated as special...
GRACE makes impressed and admiring noises. HUSSEIN [that's not his real name, obviously] enters. He is also a surgeon and was granted refugee status from an not-to-be-named Middle Eastern country three years ago.
HUSSEIN Sorry to interrupt. But I heard you were talking about the road to Damascus?
NAAP Yes, I was explaining to Grace that it is something I long to travel, that I'm desperately seeking an encounter with Christ...
HUSSEIN So, er, which road to Damascus would that be? And at which point? I mean, where exactly?
NAAP (oblivious to HUSSEIN's lack of understanding of the imagery she is using) All I want is to meet with God. To have an experience of Christ more personal than I have yet found living in such a privileged faith-filled community as I grew up in.
GRACE Er, perhaps it would be helpful if Hussein explained to you where he's from...
HUSSEIN [specifies country of origin] and after I left there my brother and I spent a few months in hiding in a village just off one of the main roads into Damascus. He was killed there, one night. We still don't know who did it, or why.
GRACE (cringeing heavily) Oh er um, God, I didn't know that (slowly sinks through [party host]'s laminate flooring in embarrassment to reprimand self for insensitivity)
NEW ACQUAINTANCE AT PARTY Good evening, so you're Grace? How do you do? Pleased to meet you!
GRACE (slightly taken aback by NAAP's formality) Hi, yes. And how do you know [name of party host omitted for confidentiality] ?
NAAP We're at church together. And I'm a surgeon like her.
GRACE (noting that NAAP appears of an ethnicity not usually indigenous to the region) So have you come over here for a job with [party host]?
NAAP No, it's a long story. But what do you do for a living?
GRACE [description of job omitted for confidentiality]
NAAP Ah Praise the Lord! Now I will indeed tell you. I have come here for a year out, seeking a Road to Damascus experience!
GRACE (thinking "why would anyone want to come here from halfway across the world to do that?!") Now this isn't a place many choose for that...
NAAP At home, in London even, my family is such that, within my community, I've got so much wealth, status... I'm treated as royalty, I am royalty. I chose here because nobody would know my background, I'd not be treated as special...
GRACE makes impressed and admiring noises. HUSSEIN [that's not his real name, obviously] enters. He is also a surgeon and was granted refugee status from an not-to-be-named Middle Eastern country three years ago.
HUSSEIN Sorry to interrupt. But I heard you were talking about the road to Damascus?
NAAP Yes, I was explaining to Grace that it is something I long to travel, that I'm desperately seeking an encounter with Christ...
HUSSEIN So, er, which road to Damascus would that be? And at which point? I mean, where exactly?
NAAP (oblivious to HUSSEIN's lack of understanding of the imagery she is using) All I want is to meet with God. To have an experience of Christ more personal than I have yet found living in such a privileged faith-filled community as I grew up in.
GRACE Er, perhaps it would be helpful if Hussein explained to you where he's from...
HUSSEIN [specifies country of origin] and after I left there my brother and I spent a few months in hiding in a village just off one of the main roads into Damascus. He was killed there, one night. We still don't know who did it, or why.
GRACE (cringeing heavily) Oh er um, God, I didn't know that (slowly sinks through [party host]'s laminate flooring in embarrassment to reprimand self for insensitivity)
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