I've only archived them for now. This means that I'll be able to put them back up whenever. I don't know whether taking them offline for now was something necessary, wise, advisable or crucial to prevent my eyeballs being gouged out... or whether I'm simply manufacturing yet more boring, self-indulgent emo-shit drama to detract from the real troubles of the world in South Ossetia and Mauritania. But I've turned on Comment Moderation and installed a titanium-plated statcounter, too.
Basically, I've just had yet another fairly explosive discussion about my decision to leave Place of Former Employment and our Church Search endeavour, this time from someone who I'd thought to be a friend... and my blogging about it all came into it, even though she'd obviously not read my blog. My concern following our altercation is that one or more people nearby may currently be googling themselves into a frenzy attempting to find my blog.
Or maybe they're not. Maybe I'm just being paranoid and should get offline and onto my marital duties. Or maybe they're really out to get me because I deserve it. Maybe I do have demons impregnated in my soul. Maybe I am an agent of Satan predestined to desecrate the Body of Christ or at least the odd ecumenical partnership round here. There's a fluffy red blob-like creature sitting at the end of the bed as I write this, stroking the cat with a shiny trident..
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9 comments:
Take care and be careful
love
I'm sorry people are hassling you. I truly don't understand why people are being so defensive and hostile about decisions you've made about your own life. If you think people are searching for your blog just to get ammo for diatribes, I don't blame you for archiving for a while.
both of you, thanks
All the hatred and suspicion being flung at you now is just proof that you were 100% right to get out of that place!
To me, it confirms my deepest suspicions about many evangelicals, that they are extremely welcoming and warm as long as you subscribe to everything they believe in, but react with astonishing venom when you begin to question anything.
That's childish, and the vicious responses are a sign of deep immaturity.
Congratulate yourself to be out of it, mourn the good bits and then move on. Once you're truly emotionally free of it all, the comments won't hurt you any longer and you can get rid of your stats counter, reinstate your posts and be yourself with all the integrity you know you have.
Another question - why the moderation of comments?
It has its place when someone trolls and consistently re-posts the same abuses or boring opinions.
But otherwise it makes much more sense to let those who want to show themselves in a bad light do so unhindered.
On another forum we had one particular person who repeatedly posted bile at the moderator. The moderator got so fed up with it that she was sorely tempted to set that commentator to moderation. But what actually happened was that all the other posters could see the character of the one spouting bile very clearly, so they kept posting replies strongly and firmly supporting the moderator.
It gave the moderator the reassurance and confidence she needed, and after a while the bile spouter left the forum.
Thanks. True and true.
Really, I agree with you about the comment moderation. Free speech and all that, too. I suppose, though, that I'd just like to be the first to see anything unpleasant written. I'll turn the comment moderation off when I can sleep without it!
I hadn't had time to go through all those posts yet, but I'm sorry you're being put under so much pressure. You should not have to feel bad about any decisions you have made or anything you decide to blog about.
Yes, sleeping is a problem. I so wish people realised that they are talking to actual people with feelings, not just to some anonymous names on the Internet.
It's a big problem with emails too, we write them to someone, but actually only write inside our own heads and then send them before re-reading. Somehow, letter writing used to be gentler, maybe because it took more time?
hmmm. Tricky one. I suppose all I can say is try to think of yourself as being firmly in the right. You have done nothing wrong.
It is natural for others to attempt to find out what you have written but I am sure that if they are, it wont be as a means to gather stuff to throw back. But then I am yet to come across a human who is realy that nasty.
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