Monday 22 October 2007

grace. eating again. half-baked post-eucharistic theological ranatings.

Communion again this evening. Cous-cous with chickpeas followed by blackcurrant crumble... I think I risk labouring a point. But maybe the way in which I started getting hungry at the very same moment that I started with an unprecedented intensity to question everything of evangelical Christianity as I'd ever before known it... perhaps in a society in which conformists aspire to size 0 and nice girls don't swallow (yes, I know, excuse the cliches) perhaps that's saying something, too. And so, we shared communion, with custard on the crumble, with old university friends. Friends both with and without all forms of Christian faith and/or scepticism, friends refusing to label themselves into any easy categories.

It suddenly struck Fiance that Christianity is not only bedevelled by division and hierarchy, religion created it. From the Greek hireus-arche=temple-ers (ie priests) at the beginning (ie in power). But why should a belief in God or a god or any god lead people into structures and doctrines that power-trip the some over the many? Ultimately, one can to drift off with Plato or consider the political scariness that generated the divine rights of kings in English history which got Charles beheaded... but it's no different today, merely a bit subtler, simply that the boss has the authority to ignore all employment legislation because God told him (directly and charismatically or traditionally and institutionally) how to handle it better himself. My question then becomes, so why do I need to see God as so majestically separate from us when I'm not sure I even believe in the concept of monarchy, when I've never yet managed to dutifully submit myself to anyone who plays the do-what-I-say-because-God-put-me-in-charge card? And I've suddenly realised (and sorry to increase the font size but I'm getting excited here) that I don't.

Jesus. The Incarnation. Him from Upstairs coming Downstairs and joining us all for bread and fish and curry and naan bread and cous-cous, chickpeas, apple crumble and lots of wine. He's here with us. We're all in it together.

They don't have to bully us any more.

This all, however, raises a rather bleak what-am-I-going-to-do-about-it question. If I'm now to put my fingers where my apple crumble is, I'd currently be typing a letter to resign from my job, on the grounds of conscience. Is that something I dare?

And if so, what else would I be doing with my life?

1 comment:

MadPriest said...

If you die with your integrity in tact then, whatever else happened, you have not been defeated.